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Poetry

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Souly
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« on: 13 November, 2009, 20:10 »

Be it funny or sad or inbetweens...here's for your poetry finds.

OK...first up, Pam Ayres!

The Embarrassing Experience With A Parrot
by Pam Ayres
 
At the Cotswold Wild Life Park,
In the merry month of May,
I paid the man the money
And went in to spend the day.
Straightway to the Pets Corner
I turned my eager feet,
To go and see the rabbits
And give them something to eat.

As I approached the hutches
I was alarmed to see
A crowd of little yobbos,
'Ollerin' with glee,
I crept up close behind them
And weighed the scene up quick,
And saw them poke the rabbits,
Poke them! . . with a stick!

'Get off you little buggers!"
I shouted in their ear,
'Don't you poke them rabbits,
That's not why they are here."
I must have really scared them,
In seconds they were gone,
And feelin' I had done some good
I carried on along.

Till up beside the Parrots Cage
I stood to view the scene,
They was lovely parrots,
Beautiful blue and green,
In and out the nestbox,
They was really having fun,
Squawking out and flying about,
All except for one.

One poor old puffed-up parrot
Clung grimly to his perch,
And as the wind blew frontwards
Backwards he would lurch,
One foot up in his feathers,
Abandoned by the rest,
He sat there, plainly dying,
His head upon his chest.

Well, I walked on down the pathway
And I stroked a nanny goat,
But the thought of parrots dyin'
Brought a lump into me throat,
I could no longer stand it,
And to the office I fled,
Politely I began: 'Scuse me,
Your parrot's nearly dead."

So me and a curator,
In urgent leaps and bounds
With a bottle of Parrot Cure
Dashed across the grounds.
The dust flew up around us,
As we reached the Parrots Pen
And the curator he turned to me
Saying 'Which one is it then?"

You know what I am going to say,
He was not there at all,
At least, not where I left him,
No, he flit from wall to wall,
As brightly as a button
Did he squawk and jump and leap,
The curator was very kind,
Saying, "I expect he was asleep."

But I was humiliated
As I stood before the wire,
The curator went back
To put his feet up by the fire,
So I let the parrot settle
And after a short search,
I found the stick the yobbos had,
And poked him off his perch.
 
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Pootsie
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« Reply #1 on: 14 November, 2009, 04:53 »

That was cute, Souly!  I was SO expecting a different ending!
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Dance like nobody is watching! 
Vixie
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« Reply #2 on: 14 November, 2009, 08:08 »

 Lol I love Pam Ayres and I loved that poem, especially as I've visited the Cotswold Wildlife Park!  Thanks for sharing, Souly. Grin

Here's Pam reciting Akaroa Cannon, a poem which may especially appeal to our kiwi members. Smile

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Souly
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« Reply #3 on: 14 November, 2009, 11:34 »

Yes Vix...that's a lovely one of Akaroa...and I certainly can relate to her loving the place...it is just beautiful. Akaroa was originally settled by French colonists, and the village/town still has a very strong French flavour. Visit it online sometime...have a look around...it is JUST divine!
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« Reply #4 on: 15 November, 2009, 09:09 »


Australian love poem

Of course I love ya darling; you're a bloody top notch bird
And when I say you're gorgeous I mean every single word
So ya bum's on the big side, I don't mind a bit of flab
It means that when I'm ready that there's something there to grab

So your belly isn't flat no more, I tell ya I don't care
So long as when I cuddle ya, I can get my arms 'round there
No sheila who is your age has nice round perky breasts
They just gave in to gravity but I know ya did ya best

I'm telling' ya the truth now, I never tell ya lies
I think it's very sexy you've got dimples on ya thighs
I swear on me Nana's grave, now, the moment that we met
I thought you was as good as I was ever gonna get

No matter what ya look like, I'll always love ya dear
Now shut up while the footy's on and get me another beer!

 Roll eyes


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Souly
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« Reply #5 on: 15 November, 2009, 11:05 »

And I read the whole darn thing with an Aussie accent!!!  Lol
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Souly
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« Reply #6 on: 08 July, 2011, 06:24 »

The wind is cold and biting
This weather really sucks!
Oh how I hate the winter
Though it's really good for ducks!

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DingBat
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« Reply #7 on: 08 July, 2011, 23:24 »


Do ducks really like winter?
Or are you just taking the p*ss?
I thought ducks only quacked,
And that it's geese which boo and hiss?!


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Souly
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« Reply #8 on: 09 July, 2011, 03:58 »

Of course ducks really like water
What you saying, you silly old bird?
They gotsta clean their a**es somehow
Ain't got paper, haven't you heard?
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